just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
