i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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