I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize