jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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