If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
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