Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Randomize
