Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
