people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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