I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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