butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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