don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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