will power is for people who don't want to get laid
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
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