i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
