Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
