I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
