I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize