yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
