Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
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