so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
