i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Randomize
