May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Randomize