escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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