I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
