If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
