We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
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