what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
