whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
If that was your dad, he is hot
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
