I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
