I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
