I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
being pregnant is like rehab
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
