I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Randomize
