You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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