its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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