Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
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