bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Randomize
