You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Randomize
