I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
we made out on top of his cat.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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