Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
