I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Randomize
