I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
