It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
