Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
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