It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
