if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Randomize
