um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
