it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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