Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
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