I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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