you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Pants are for mortals
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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