He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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